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Divorcing the Clutter with Feng Shui
by Cheryl Larson ©
Depending on our own life experiences with personal relationships and our attachments to our belongings we have gathered over the years on earth, this topic will have a different meaning for each one of us here. You may or may not be able to relate in this context, yet keep your heart and mind open and take what fits and throw the other information out.
I will start off with giving you the definitions from Webster dictionary for divorcing and for clutter:
Divorcing:
- To end marriage with one's spouse by divorce or to dissolve the marriage contract.
- To terminate an existing relationship or union.
- To part by a legal separation, to sever conjugal ties.
- To become divided or detached, to sever an association.
Clutter:
- To fill or cover with scattered or disordered things that impede movement or reduce effectiveness.
- A crowded or confused mass or collection, to run in disorder.
Also, the word "clutter" derives from the Middle English word "clotter" which means to coagulate.
Based on my perspective, I'll share with you what "Divorcing the Clutter" means through my eyes.
As long as I can remember I've lived by this one belief:
If
an item does not have a place, then it has no purpose.
AND
Without a purpose it has no reason to belong.
I'll give you my favorite childhood story on how this belief got started. When I was a child we would visit my Grandma and Grandpa's house just about every weekend. They were both born in the late 1890's and had gone through the depression which meant they kept everything, I mean everything an threw nothing away. So not only did they have clutter, they had junkie clutter. Most often when I was there, I would get involved in some creative craft project. While I was gathering supplies, I would usually run into something that I could not find. I would say "Grandma where's the scissors?" Her standard reply would be "Now let's see... I know I had them here just the other day." She would then spend the next week looking for the scissors and on my next visit she would say "Oh, I found the scissors you were looking for, now where did I put them?" By that time the purpose of the scissors was gone and I was on to the next project, most likely hunting down the next item that was lost.
So from a very early age I related clutter to confusion, frustration, embarrassment and the feeling of being LOST. I dearly loved my grandparents, so I learned to accept that's just the way they chose to live their life. From these lessons, I vowed that I would ALWAYS keep my belongings in order and keep clutter under control. Ironically enough that doesn't necessarily solve the underlying issues.
My belief of "everything has a place or it has no purpose" has served me well up until learning about Feng Shui.
I have now adapted belief #2:
Even
if an item has a dedicated space to belong,
that doesn't mean its purpose is still valid.
The purpose of this item can and may have become outgrown.
This is where "Divorcing the Clutter with Feng Shui" comes into view. My clutter was nothing like my grandmothers. No excessive junkie clutter from me... mine has always been very organized clutter. And since it's always been organized with dedicated space it doesn't appear like clutter to most people. Yet the fact is I've held on to belongings way past their expiration date. In my process I have determined there are "9" basic stages to collecting clutter.
So at this point, I would like to ask all of you to close your eyes and find your center, while I take you through the 9 stages of Divorcing the Clutter with Feng Shui.
Stage 1: Infatuation and dating with Clutter
When you first lay your eyes on Clutter it's love at first sight. It doesn't look like Clutter. It's in disguise. Your heart starts to pound out of your chest, your palms get sweaty and you're speechless. You finally get the nerve up to ask Clutter out on a date. Clutter says "Yes, I've been eyeing you from a distance and was hoping you would take me home." The dating scene goes smooth with Clutter and it's not long before Clutter says "I love you, will you marry me?" It's music to your ears and its impossible to say anything else but "Yes!"
Stage 2: The Marriage with Clutter
It's a fairy tail wedding with Clutter on a beautiful spring day. Every little detail is remembered and makes this moment priceless. You believe with all your heart that this is a match made in heaven and you vow till death do us part with Clutter.
Stage 3: The Honeymoon with Clutter
You're deeply in love with one another, neither one of you could do no wrong. You make starry eyes at Clutter and communication happens on a deeper lever without spoken words. Life is priceless and you couldn't imagine a day without having your Clutter in your life.
Stage 4: Forever after, till death do us part with Clutter
Routine with Clutter is now normal. Little issues seem to surface but there's nothing you can't overcome. You've learned each others style and know when to speak up and when to back down. Communication is going strong and you know you'll grow old together with Clutter.
Stage 5: Reality check with Clutter
You now question what's important to you since life on earth is not forever and you wonder "Is this all there is?" The things that you found attractive to Clutter when you first met, are now the things that irritate you the most. Little issues become big issues with Clutter.
Stage 6: The long good-byes and the death of Clutter
Communication breaks down and you find your needs not being met by Clutter. Your purpose of being with Clutter has dissolved and there is little to no reason to hold on to Clutter. Slow by sure death takes hold and the end is here.
Stage 7: The bonfire party with Clutter
After shedding lots of tears and years have gone by, healing has taken place. You find you're ready to let go of the dreams with Clutter. You sort through the piles of memories one last time before packing them up in preparation for the Big Bonfire Party. You say your final good-byes to Clutter and recite the Three Secrets of Reinforcement (Om Ma Ni Pad Me Hum) nine times to complete the process.
Stage 8: There's no place like home - without Clutter
The space has been emptied box by box from outgrown Clutter. You now know that opportunities are endless when you're in harmony with your space. The next time you run across Clutter, you no longer have a burning desire to keep it in your home.
Stage 9: My door is always open...no Clutter in sight
The air is now clear, the energy is moving freely and the wind and water begin to dance without Clutter. Life has a new meaning with a new beginning.
Dream and it will be...
Be and it will come!
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